My poor neglected blog I confess that the reason is because I believe that if you have nothing positive to share just keep thinking about what you have to say. So now as I sit here I want to share some lessons I have learned in the last two months. I have been busy with work, this is my first year teaching over 120 students, so trying to keep up is always a challenge. I want to do the best job possible but I also want to challenge them to do their best. This week I saw kids about to give up on themselves because they are not used to being successful. That worries me I know these kids are capable brilliant and more. Why are they giving up? What can I do? I am still thinking about this but it is hard for me to watch because I will never give up on them. I have been doing this for 15 years and it really does not get easy. Every new group of kids brings a different challenge to the table, and while I welcome the challenge it is sometimes overwhelming when I think too much about it. I am very fortunate this year to have a student teacher that is very capable and that has created great connections with the kids and that I can bounce ideas and frustrations with him and we can come up with solutions together. Makes my job a little easier. The department has embraced me and that feels good so life is the job front while not easy and consumes me, is going good.
My personal life well that is always interesting, as our kids get older their needs and our ideas of what they should do with their lives always hits a wall. Our kids are independent thinkers which is healthy and welcomed by me. My hubby well lets just say the past few weeks have been really hard on him, and while I wish he would relax and try to go with the flow of changes in our kids lives he is kind of stubborn and I doubt that is in his gene makeup. He is convinced his life will be better if he lives in Puerto Rico dealing with the drama of his siblings and nieces and nephews. While I don't understand his thinking I have decided to just keep my mouth and feelings to myself, and see what happens in the next few months. This is not a question of him not loving me, it is a matter of him dealing with all the demons that have taken over his life since his mother died. I have embraced the fact that until he deals with these issues there will always be this notion in his head that life is better anywhere his kids are not. We have a saying "Ojos que no ven corazon que no siente" While I can translate the essence of this "if you don't see it with your eyes it will not hurt you", In Spanish the impact is stronger. I just wish I had some magic formula that would help everyone deal with whatever issues are near to their heart but I don't. So I just listen and try to mediate between all parties involved and hope that Jose realizes I am not taking sides I am just being a Mom. My kids would argue I always take his side I say I always remain in the middle trying for everyone to reach a compromise. Do I do this? I am not sure right now I know it is consuming my energy, so it is a big deal. Sometimes I wish people did not expect that I am going to be strong all the time. I want to be taken care off and not have to worry about everything. Oh well so is life. So I go on and do what I have to do and continue to think about all the possible solutions to the problems we face everyday.
On the creating front I am creating but I am not sharing much a part of me just wants to see where this road is taking me. After almost two years of working with DDD7 designs the owner decided to stop production of her Spanish line and my tenure in the design team is done. This was hard since I spent so many months hoping this venture would take off. The need for the papers and designs is there. She is still producing her beautiful French paper line but could only carry one of the Spanish team to the French side and Maite got that honor and because I love Maite I wish her the best. Edith is very lucky to have her. I am looking forward to creating projects for Paper House and right now I am hoping that any manufacturer that needs and eclectic scraper that loves to create and is always willing to push the envelope of creativity and will add not only creativity but diversity to their team will contact me and let me create for them. I have decided that only if I sell myself will I receive the opportunities I want for myself. In my dream world I would love to Design for Maya Road and Deluxe Designs I love what they are doing with their chipboard lines and have been working with their products a lot. Fancy Pants chipboards are awesome too. I have this love affair with all Gin-X products so that is a company I would love to work for. I know there are others out there like American Crafts, Karen Fosters, EK, Anna Griffin, KandC, Making Memories, Die Cuts with a View. Right now for me it's all about creating, and chipboard is on my mind.
There is something about chipboard the really makes me smile I love to paint it, Ink it, draw designs on them. It is flexible and allows me to create what I love. So like I said before if you are a Manufacturer and need an artist to interpret your product in a different way than the norm email me. My name is Wanda E. Santiago and I approve this message.
On the Digital front Simple Scrapbook is about to launch it's New Magazine and Website and as part of their New Creative Editorial Board I am excited about this. I love that my work in the Digital Realm is valued. I love working in the Digital realm there is something so calming about being on the computer and creating, to be recognized for my work in this department is a dream come true for me. Seeing my name along artist that I admire and look up to is exciting.
http://www.digitalscrapbooking.com/
The next year in the digital realm is going to be something I am going to look forward too. I know this is going to be big, I am happy I get to be a part of this. So keep checking out the site sign up for updates subscribe to the new magazine it is going to be BIG.
My health is fragile right now that is all I will say about this, I am taking care of myself and doing everything the Dr's are telling me to do. My hope is that this too will pass and that by December I will have answers and solutions to the things that are making my life harder these days. I refuse to feel sorry for myself and please be assured if you read my blog that some of the issues I am dealing with are life and death things. The good news is that I am taking steps to change what is going on, the process is slow and painful but I want to be around for a long time so I will continue to do what the Dr's tell me to do.
Here are some of the pages I have worked on in the past few weeks some of them are over two years old and I am finally sharing them, I am glad I can create and I do love to share, I am just being selective of how I share. They represent the range of the work I do when I look at them they make me smile and happy which is the best thing about creating. I hope you enjoy this journey with me. Creating is the one process that I will never get tired of. I always want to create in one way or another. The idea that something is being made by my hands always makes my adrenaline pump. It is a very good thing. Hugs and leave some love if you come by so I know you have been around.
I also want to shout out to HP who makes the best printers in the world seriously and they can hook me up with a laptop anytime so I can do my digital work anywhere I go hey a girl can dream right, My Digital work is going to be a major focus for me this year and I need mobility as part of my computer needs. I can't afford one right now but I can dream and I can also test drive any model they might be designing for the computer scrappers out there. It is my blog and I will cry if I want too or anything else I want to do!! Keep th epeace and remeber to exercise your right to VOTE!!
I can't believe the weekend is almost over. Life has that tendency to keep on going can't stop it from moving if I say so myself. I was busy this weekend creating editing photos and doing layouts for my friend Sylvie's little girls. I do enjoy doing these little girls are very special. Jimmy is spending Halloween with his Dad I hope Nyome gets to have him for some hours, he is Rafael of the Ninja turtles. I love that little guy he makes me smile. He is so verbal now compared to where he was two years ago it is funny to hear him talk and be sassy and all. I have pictures of him in his costume I have to post them. I also have a layout made but all my paper layouts are waiting to b e scanned. That is the hardest part of sharing scanning and stitching which is why I love Digital instant gratification and it is beautiful to boot. My health is stable that is all I will say for now it is all a process I have an appointment on Tuesday and maybe more answers by then.
The weekend was almost drama free and for that I am thankful. Kids I tell you no matter what age they are a handful. Here is some of the things I have been working on. I am also posting some photos with Jimmy and his costume and some from the pumpkin patch. I love seeing the relationship Jimmy has with his Titi Nicole she adores him and he adores her back. Life should be so simple. Today I was reminded one more time why I love my mother so much regardless of the fact that every once in a while she reminds me I might not get to heaven if I continue in the path I am. Hey it's my Mom she can tell me anything. Anyways she came to visit with my brother and they joined us for Dinner good thing I still have the Habit of cooking for Many so there is always plenty of food. We sat down and visited and we were talking about my upcoming surgery and it was just nice to just talk to her. It is one of those moments you just cherish forever, reminds me of how lucky and blessed to have her in my life and how she has molded the person I am today. I do love her so much sometimes words are not enough. So I write it down so when she reads the blog she knows I always listen and I always think about what she says. I might not always do things her way but I always listen to her words of wisdom after all she is my mother. Today I was talking to Nyome and her Dad about my last wishes if anything were to happen to me it's important to talk about these things life and death should be a part of the human experience. I was talking about wanting to be cremated and no life support for me I do not wish to be a burden to anyone. I now some people have issues when others talk about death but to me it is such a normal extension of living I want to remind them of how I feel. It was not a sad talk it was a matter of fact conversation that makes me happy I can have and not feel sad about my choices because I know they will respect them. Nyome was funny said to her Dad you know if Mom dies you will die right after her you guys can't live with out each other. I laughed but it is true I have no Idea what would happen if I loss Jose so we are not going to go there at least not today. Well enough of my mussings for today hope you have a wonderful week and remeber to make sure you tell the people you love that you love them. Blogger is acting up so photos will come later sorry!! Hugs Wanda
